# 225 The Hidden Anguish in Moms
Part of being a good therapist is being a good listener and providing a safe place for moms to open up and tell their truth. Moms tell me many hard and challenging stories; though the stories are different, there is a common thread. It’s not obvious to mom at first but when I expose this hidden thread, there is a sense of being seen and relief. And what is the thread?
ANGUISH
If you are a mom and anguish over your kids, I want you to know you are not alone. Many moms silently suffer with intense feelings of anguish. You see something in your teen that you feel shame about or are worried about. You hide this from others because you don’t want to be judged and it would feel too awful to tell anyone else. So you isolate in your anguish.
Here’s what’s normal moms—- you can love your teen and the teenage years, be proud of their accomplishments, and think they are amazing AND your teens will struggle, make some choices that scare you, make you sad, and push against your values. All these things cause us anguish.
In this episode, I define anguish and how moms experience it. Anguish can be brutal on moms.
Mom, you can’t completely escape anguish but you can dial down the severity. I give you five practical ways you can contain the anguish and not let it dominate your life.