# 285 Raising Securely Attached Teens: Interview with Eli Harwood
Are you struggling to maintain a strong connection with your teen as they navigate the complex emotions of adolescence? Do you find yourself caught between managing their daily tasks and truly engaging with them on a deeper level?
In this episode of the Power Your Parenting Moms of Teens Podcast, host Colleen O’Grady sits down with licensed therapist Eli Harwood to discuss the transformative power of connection-focused parenting. Harwood, who has spent two decades studying attachment, shares her insights on how building secure attachments with teens can foster confidence, empathy, and resilience. The conversation delves into the importance of attunement, co-regulation, and the shift from being a safe haven to a secure base as teens grow. Harwood emphasizes the critical role of maintaining an authentic connection with teens, even as they begin to turn to their peers for support.
ELI HARWOOD is a licensed therapist who lives in Colorado with her husband, Trevor, and their three children. Eli has been nerding out on attachment research for the past two decades and is on a mission to help make the world a better place, one relationship at a time. She continues this mission in her clinical work, her writing, and running her mouth about attachment on social media. When she isn’t working to make the world a more secure place, she is playing dress-up with her kids, obsessing about her sourdough starter, and reminiscing about that one time she won a set of globes as a Price is Right contestant.
Key Takeaways:
Connection-focused parenting is essential for fostering a teen’s emotional and mental health. By prioritizing connection over control, parents can help their teens feel seen, heard, and supported, which in turn strengthens their resilience and self-esteem. Harwood stresses the importance of showing up consistently for both the tender and triumphant moments in a teen’s life and encourages moms to focus on “lighting up” when their child enters the room, listening actively, and being quick to repair any relational ruptures. As teens grow, they naturally begin to rely more on their peers, but maintaining a secure attachment with their parents remains crucial for their overall well-being.
Learn more about Eli at AttachmentNerd.com.
Follow her on instagram at https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd