6 Steps to Get Your Life Back on Track
Last week Sara came to see me in my private practice. Sara had that spaced out, frazzled look. She said, “I want my life back. I am SOOOOOO ready for school to start.”
Sara is definitely not alone. This is the time of year mothers are holding on for dear life and counting the days before school starts.
Yes, we love having our kid’s home for the summer. We love the vacations and the slower pace. We love not having the pressure of school, but having our daughter’s home for the summer brings a whole new set of pressures.
There is the pressure of your bored daughter. She lets you know she is miserable by moaning and groaning around the house. She lies around watching TV or being on facebook constantly. She wants you to entertain her and take away her boredom.
There is the pressure of the “No way am I going to be bored” daughter. She is constantly making plans and wanting you to shuttle her all over the place. Or she always seems to be creating her own excitement or drama.
There is the pressure of having lots of kids in your house. There is more noise than ever. You find you are picking up towels, dishes or clothes nonstop. Your refrigerator empties at an amazing speed. It seems like you are always going to the grocery store.
There is the pressure of getting things done. Many of you work outside of the home, and are juggling more than ever. The spaces of sanity in your life get eaten up by everyone else’s demands.
This pressure is distracting and results in your life getting out of balanced. You feel off track. You get frustrated because you feel like you are not getting anything accomplished. You’ve slacked off on exercising. You can’t remember the last time you had fun.
This is understandable. It’s a hard time of years for moms. You don’t need to beat yourself up about it. Here’s an easy way to get back on track.
6 Steps to Get Your Life Back on Track
1. Admit you’re off track
Once you have admitted you are off track, the next moment is very important. You are at a fork in the road. This is where many mothers default to shame. You beat yourself up for not being able to get it together. You think, “You must be a bad mom.”This road will take you nowhere fast.
Take the high “conscious” road. The conscious road admits you’re off track, knowing that everyone gets off track. There is no need to beat yourself up; you can simply make a decision to get back on track.
This one step will change everything.
2. Access your life
You need time to assess your life. There is nothing on your to-do list that is more important than this.
Schedule 30 minutes this week to reflect on what’s going on. Make sure you choose a place where no one or nothing can distract you. Turn off your phone and unplug from the world and tune into you.
Grab a journal or some paper and ask yourself these questions.
- What is bothering me?
- Where am I off track?
- What do I want to be doing?
3. Let it go
What do you want to let go of? It could be worry, anger or sadness.
It’s easy for mothers to carry everyone’s feelings and internalize stress. Give yourself the gift of releasing. You can release by writing out your feelings. Let the tears come. Tears are a great way to release tension.
Turn it into prayer and place your stress and worries in God’s hands. The key thing here is that you let go of the struggle you have been carrying.
4. Remember who you are
This is coming back to your center. What is important to you? This includes your values, spirituality, priorities, your desires and intuition. Remembering what’s important to you, is like going to a chiropractor. It puts everything back in alignment. Being in alignment allows you to walk tall and steady. When you are out of alignment you are stumbling around like a crazed, drunk person.
5. Decide again
You are one decision away from getting back on track. It starts with this decision. All the time we complain and worry wastes so much energy. Complaining doesn’t get you back on track. Make a drama free decision and decide to start again. It’s not too late.
Why not decide now to get back on track?
6. Take one small step
The reason it feels so hard to get back on track is because it feels so overwhelming. When you feel out of control, you are in a fog and it’s hard to find your way out.
Think about the first small step. This is all you have to worry about.
A good place to start for your first small step is scheduling the 30 minutes assessment that I suggested in step 2. After you take that step, ask yourself what is the next step I need to take. Take it one step at a time.
Maybe your step is to ask someone for help. There are plenty of great people out there that can give you direction. Call a friend, life coach or therapist and they can give you helpful feedback and perspective.
Each step you take from a conscious place gives you that “I feel good” energy and helps you get your life back.
Right now get out your calendar and schedule your 30 minute assessment.