All Mothered Out? The 5 Essential Needs to Feeling Good
Do you need a vacation from the Holidays?
I wouldn’t be surprised if you are All Mothered Out.
You know if you are All Mothered Out because…
- You have no patience, especially with your kids.
- You feel like you are going to implode if you see one more towel on the bathroom floor.
- Everything about your daughter is irritating you.
- You are sick of her attitude and YOU LET HER KNOW IT!
- You feel like quitting your mother job…especially laundry and picking up after everyone.
- You feel trapped at home.
- You collapse on your bed in tears, because no one appreciates you and you feel taken for granted.
- You feel flabby and you can’t stand how your jeans fit.
- You can’t remember the last time you had fun.
- You daydream about escaping to a tropical deserted island.
The bottom line it feels terrible being “All Mothered Out,” but you are not alone.
Holidays are draining, plus, it takes a lot of energy to parent your daughter. You are supposed to provide structure, love, and protection to your teenage daughter. To do this you need lots of energy. The demands on you can be 24/7.
You start out with enthusiasm and “I feel good” energy, but this “I feel good” energy gets drained pretty quickly. This is normal, but here is where it becomes a problem. Mothers aren’t good at refilling their “I feel good” energy when it gets depleted. This is for a couple of reasons. First, it feels selfish to pay attention to you, and secondly, you want someone else to rescue you.
No one is going to rescue you. It’s up to you.
The good news is that you can fill up your mother cup, by paying attention to the 5 essential areas to feel good.
It’s time to pay attention to you and your needs.
If you want to feel good again, you need to pay attention to each essential area.
Getting a manicure once a week will not change your life and awaken your soul. Drinking a bottle of wine or going on a major shopping spree will not fill you up with good energy either. Often, the things that we do to comfort us drain us more.
5 Essential Needs to Feel Good
1. Foundational
Start with the basics. Taking good care of your physical body is foundational for your “I feel good” energy. You feel good when you get eight hours of restful sleep. You feel good when you relax and have downtime. You feel good when you eat healthy meals and exercise consistently.
What is one thing you can do to take care of your foundational needs?
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2. Maintenance
The maintenance of your personal life and family life is critical to the “I feel good” energy. You feel good when your home is decorated the way you like it, everything is in order, your papers are filed and the clutter is gone. You feel good when your car is cleaned and vacuumed. You feel good when you wear cute clothes and they fit.
What is one thing you can do to take care of your maintenance needs?
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3. Relational
Feeling loved and appreciated fills you with “I feel good” energy. You feel good when you are relaxed and enjoying quality time with your friends, and family. It feels good to watch movies, be playful with the dog, go to the beach, and enjoy a long leisurely meal with a loved one. It feels good to be seen, valued, and loved unconditionally. In fact, it feels awesome.
What is one thing you can do to take care of your relational needs?
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4. Self-enrichment
Mothers frequently dismiss this area because it feels frivolous. At first glance, it looks like it benefits you and not your family. Nothing can be farther from the truth. Self-enrichment is the quickest way for you to get your spark back, find fulfillment and purpose in life. It feels good to express your creativity, to take a dance class or piano lesson, or redecorate your home. It feels good to challenge yourself physically if that’s running one minute on a treadmill or your first marathon. It feels good leaving a job and finding work that is meaningful and rewarding. It feels good to learn something new. It feels good to travel and learn about other cultures.
What is one thing you can do to take care of your self-enrichment needs?
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5. Spiritual
What can be a better place to refill your “I feel good” energy than tapping into the source of all life and energy? You do this through prayer, meditation, inspirational reading, reflection, gratitude, worship, and basking in the beauty of nature. All of these things facilitate an intimate connection with God.
It feels good to be in alignment with yourself and God. It feels good to drink in the beauty of a sunset and know you are connected to the creator of the universe. It feels good to be filled with love and compassion for the world. It feels good to know you are serving the world and living your destiny.
What is one thing you can do to take care of your spiritual needs?
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Take 15 minutes and write down 5 things you can do this week to replenish your energy.
On the lighter side…
A few years ago I wrote a song called, All Mothered Out… I wrote it tongue and cheek…like a bad Country Western song. (You could probably add your own verse.)
You can watch my video by clicking here: https://youtu.be/Rawxc9m3WZI