Are You Weary from Worry? 4 Ways to Turn This Around

Are You Weary from Worry? 4 Ways to Turn This Around

What do you worry about? If you haven’t worried about anything in the past week then you do not need to read this article. But most of us worry about something. Even the most enlightened and spiritual will find themselves in a state of worry.

We worry about different things. You may worry about your daughter, marriage, job, parents or money. Your daughter worries about how she looks and about her friends, boyfriend or no boyfriends. She worries if she can make the team or get the grades she needs to get in the college of her choice.

Worry is an uninvited guest.

You don’t wake up and think I will worry today. It hijacks you when you are driving, taking a shower or trying to get some work done. It comes unannounced and then it doesn’t want to leave.

Worry eats up all your attention.

You can be talking to a friend or reading a book and the worry thoughts are pulling for your attention leaving you preoccupied, scattered and unclear. This is when you make stupid mistakes like going to the grocery store to buy milk and then you buy everything but the milk.

Worry drains your “I feel good” energy.

Imagine your brain is a computer. Worry is like viruses and adware. When viruses attack your computer everything slows down and you are left staring at the spinning circle. The same is with worry. The things you want to focus on in life, get eaten up by worry, then you’re left staring at the spinning circle of your thoughts.

Worry robs you of blessings and is contagious.

I remember 2 years ago in January I was leading a retreat an hour outside of Houston. The day before we were going on the retreat, Houston had an unusual freeze. It only freezes in Houston every 5 years. The media was milking this for all its worth. They kept showing accidents on the freeway caused from ice. (Actually they showed one video of the same accident over and over again.) The news told everyone to stay home. The whole city was worried about the weather. (Anyone living north of Houston would have thought all this worry was ridiculous.)

The women on the retreat called me to see if we were going to cancel the retreat. The worry was contagious and I didn’t want to be responsible for any accidents. After looking at the weather report, (praying) and knowing Houston, I decided to have the retreat. It ended up the roads were fine and there was no ice. The next day the weather warmed up into the 50’s. It was an amazing retreat for these women. We laughed and these women had significant breakthroughs that changed their life.

We could have all missed it. The collective worry could have kept us from an amazing blessing.

4 Ways to turn worry around

1. Name the worry

Worry thoughts spin so fast in our brains it’s hard to know what we are worrying about. These thoughts are like an old fashioned record that keeps replaying the same thing over and over again.

Take 5 minutes and write down what you are worrying about. Write everything about it. What are you afraid of now and in the future? How does your worry impact the people you love? Write it all out.

Though this feels counterintuitive this saves you time in the long run.

2. Let your worry plead its case

Give your worry time to plead its case. Here is the secret. Tell your worry I will listen to you one time, now give me your best shot. And then really go for it. Worry. Worry. Worry. Now you are done. You don’t have to worry about this same thing 5 million more times.

3. Now it’s time to cross examine your worry

After the worry has pleaded its case you are going to cross examine. Ask your worry “is this really true?” The worry thought is going to say, “Yes it is true.” Then you can ask another question, “How likely will that happen?” Yes, bad things happen, but how likely is this going to happen to you? These questions help you take the mountain down to the molehill.

4. Take action

Now that you have a more realistic picture of what you are worrying about, ask yourself this question. “What action do I need to take?” “Is there something I can do to proactively deal with my worry. Decide what you are going to do and then let it go. See, worry is about feeling out of control. When you decide what you are going to do, the worry calms down because you have taken back the reins.

5. Look for the blessing

Is there a blessing behind your worry?

Here’s how this plays out. You are worried that your daughter won’t do well next year at school and will fail out. Write down every worry that pertains to this worry because these viruses multiply quickly. You ask “is it true that she will fail out of school?” You answer “she could.” Then ask yourself “How likely will that happen? You say she could fail out of Biology and Math but probably will do fine in her other classes. Then you ask yourself “What action can I take.” You decide that you will line up a tutor for next year. You make another decision that you will evaluate how she is doing after the first month of school. Now you don’t have to worry, because you have a plan in place. Ask yourself, “What is the blessing behind the worry? The blessing is when you are not preoccupied, you can enjoy your daughter more.

Have a worry free week.